Myth: The birth mother will regret her decision for the rest of her life.
Fact: Birth mothers who understand that the adoption decision gives their baby a stable future of opportunity and love, will live the rest of their lives knowing they've given their baby a very special gift.
Myth: A birth mother who chooses adoption will have serious emotional problems.
Fact: When a birth mother chooses adoption:
- she will have more opportunity to live a stable life.
- she will have a much better chance of a successful and happy marriage.
- she is much less likely to live in poverty.
- she will be much more likely to complete her education and have a good job.
Myth: Adoption is a more traumatic experience for a woman than abortion.
Fact: With an abortion, the pain of deep regret may continue for a lifetime. Adoption, when understood correctly, is initially painful but is then followed by a lifetime of satisfaction for having planned a wonderful life for the child.
Myth: Birth mothers who plan adoption are uncaring and soon forget about their baby.
Fact: Birth mothers are brave women who selflessly place the futures of their children ahead of their own immediate desire to be parents. Their thoughts in the future are about the good and positive life they gave their child.
Myth: Adoption is an irresponsible act and women who choose adoption take the easy way out.
Fact: Adoption is a responsible decision made by a person mature enough to place the best interests of her baby ahead of her immediate emotions.
Myth: Adoption damages the child.
Fact: On virtually every measurement of social success and happiness, the advantage goes to adoption! The adopted child is:
- more likely to finish school.
- less likely to be delinquent.
- more likely to have a better job.
- more likely to have a stable marriage.
- less likely to live in poverty than if the child were raised in a single parent home.
Myth: Adopted children grow up feeling bitter and rejected.
Fact: The child will grow up knowing that his family was created by adoption and understanding that his or her birth mother selflessly planned a wonderful future for her child. The child will be grateful for the birth parents' choice of adoption.
Myth: Adoptive parents are not as fit to raise a child as his or her biological parents.
Fact: An unplanned pregnancy can affect all types of women, ranging in age and maturity levels. Birth mothers may be young or old, already parenting other children, not financially stable, or simply seeking a more permanent and stable future for the child than they can provide at this time. Adoptive parents, on the other hand, are ready and excited to take on the responsibility of parenthood. They have gone through an extensive screening process to qualify and prepare them to be successful parents.
Myth: The adoption process is secretive.
Fact: Birth mothers at AAI can select and meet with the adoptive family, having the opportunity to personally ask and receive information directly from them, as well as provide information for them to share with their child.
Myth: Adoptive parents know very little about the baby's background.
Fact: Adoptive families at AAI receive all non-identifying information that you share with us. Furthermore, the family of your choice will always speak positively about you as they raise your/their child.
Myth: Birth parents have no say in the choice of adoptive parents.
Fact: Birth mothers have all the say in the selection of the family.
Myth: If I choose adoption, the baby will go into foster care before he or she is adopted.
Fact: The baby often goes straight home with the family from the hospital. The baby may only spend time in host care if you are unsure of your decision, if there are complications in the legal process, or until the legal release procedures are completed. Your caseworker will work out the details with you based on your wishes and the specifics of your case.