International Adoption
Becoming Parents
Benjamin and Joanna had always imagined what life was like in developing countries around the world, but it would take a baby to show them.
Adoption
The couple had talked about adopting at some point because they had both seen their families grow through adoption. Therefore, when Benjamin and Joanna decided to start their family, adoption seemed the natural course to follow. After researching available countries, the couple decided to adopt from Ethiopia because of the tremendous need for adoptive parents there. “We wanted to be parents, and there are millions of children in Africa that need parents,” says Benjamin. “It seemed like an easy decision for us.”
Traveling to Ethiopia
When they traveled to Ethiopia this past June to bring their son home, they were able to experience the life and culture of a third world country firsthand. “Stepping onto the continent of Africa was something we will always remember,” says Joanna. “We were impressed by how warm the people were in welcoming and helping us throughout our travel. We were amazed by the beauty of the country and saddened by the poverty. We enjoyed the richness of traditions we saw.”
Sightseeing
During their trip to Ethiopia, Benjamin and Joanna had the opportunity to visit three orphanages within the country. “We were pleased and impressed to see how well run these facilities were,” says Benjamin. “They seemed to be filled with dedicated caregivers and administrators that were obviously passionate about their work. While it was difficult to see the children in the orphanage, it gave us hope that these children are well cared for.” The couple was also able to visit many tourist attractions in Addis Ababa, including the National Museum, the museum at Addis Ababa University, the Merkato (the largest open-air market in Africa), St. George’s Cathedral, and a few other smaller markets in addition to driving two hours north of Addis Ababa to visit a monastery, which allowed them to see the countryside.
The Most Rewarding Trip
While Benjamin and Joanna agree that the sightseeing opportunities in Addis Ababa were wonderful, the locations they visited were not the most important trips that they made during their stay. “The most rewarding trip,” says Joanna, “was traveling to Debre Zeit to see the town our son was born in and meeting his birth mother.” Benjamin and Joanna had repeatedly stated during their adoption process that they were open to meeting their child’s birth mother if she was willing and if the personnel in Ethiopia were able to make this happen. The couple plan to share information they learned about their son’s birth mother with him as he grows older in order to provide a link to his past. This was such a positive experience that they now recommend that other adoptive parents consider meeting their children’s birth mother or birth family members, if possible.
Ethiopian Culture
For Benjamin and Joanna, making sure that their son remains connected to his Ethiopian heritage is a priority for them. Because of this, the couple tried to absorb the Ethiopian culture as much as possible during their stay. They chose to lodge at the guesthouse set up for adoptive families, which the couple says made it easier to experience the culture firsthand. “Upon arrival, we were met with a traditional welcome and meal,” says Benjamin. “While staying there, we were able to have numerous conversations with the workers and enjoyed learning about the culture from them.” The couple also had the opportunity to make and eat injera, a pancake-like bread that is a staple of the Ethiopian diet, and to attend a traditional Ethiopian dinner, which included dancing.
Meeting Mikias
Yet, all of these amazing experiences pale in comparison to what they felt when they met their son, whom they named Mikias Henock. “Seeing Mikias for the first time was a very surreal experience,” says Joanna. “When we got to the orphanage we were sitting in a room with the director and a nanny walked in holding him. After thinking about him and staring at the same pictures for so long, it was very moving and amazing to see him in person and hold him. He smiled instantly, and we both couldn’t help but smile, too.”
Adjusting
Benjamin and Joanna returned home to the U.S. on June 16, and since that time, Mikias has been adjusting wonderfully. “Mikias has made amazing strides since moving to the U.S.,” says Joanna. “From starting out eating every two hours and going to bed at 2pm, he has begun to develop a manageable routine.” They believe that Mikias is becoming more and more comfortable with their family, and they now know that he is the perfect fit for them. “We knew we were a match for each other soon after bringing him to our house because he really likes the outdoors, and so do we!” says Benjamin.
So far, the family has been enjoying a lot of bonding time together. They frequently go running with a baby jogger stroller and have already planned their first camping trip. They also just attended a wedding and reception together.
Keeping the Culture
As Mikias grows, Benjamin and Joanna plan to integrate the Ethiopian culture into their family in order to keep their son connected to his heritage. “While in Ethiopia,” says Benjamin, “we both really took the opportunity to learn and remember as much as we could. We are hoping to pass this knowledge on to Mikias until we can take him back there to see for himself. We purchased 18 small gifts for Mikias to present to him each year on the day we met. We hope these small tokens of his home country will help him to feel somewhat connected. In addition, when we spoke to Mikias’ birth mother, we asked her what traditions her family honored. We plan on integrating those into our annual celebrations. We also have decorated Mikias’ room with reminders of Ethiopia. On his wall are African prints we purchased while abroad and photographs of his home country, including a picture of his birth mother.”
Advice for Other Families
For other families considering adopting from Ethiopia, Joanna says, “This experience has enriched both of our lives immeasurably. We started this process hoping to give a child a home, but along the way, we learned a lot about people halfway around the world. We were humbled by the graciousness we received for the donations we brought. We were enlightened as to what it feels like to be in the minority. Most importantly, we became the lucky ones in having Mikias be a part of our lives. For these reasons, we highly recommend AAI’s Ethiopian adoption program.”
For More Information
To learn more about our Ethiopia adoption program, please visit our Ethiopia adoption page.
