International Adoption
“A Good Mumma”
Roxane had always dreamed of becoming a mother, and as the years passed by, the desire grew stronger.
Although Roxane had married earlier in life, the relationship ended in divorce without any children. After the divorce, Roxane met several “nice men” but none that shared her same passion for family.
Deciding to Adopt
Then, in 2003, Roxane decided to pursue adoption to fulfill her dream of motherhood. She looked to Adoption Associates, Inc. because her sister had worked for the agency briefly and always spoke highly of her colleagues. “I felt that I could trust AAI right from the beginning of the process,” says Roxane.
Choosing the Guatemala Program
As a teacher and a counselor, Roxane has always felt a special connection to her Latino students, and because of this, Roxane decided to adopt through AAI’s Guatemala program. “I knew from the beginning of my search that my children would be Latino,” says Roxane. Although this decision was an easy one for Roxane, the adoption process proved to be much more challenging.
Hague Deliberations
During the process of adopting her first child, Mya, the Hague was being debated, and there was uncertainty as to whether or not her case would be allowed to proceed. “At one point I had to sign a disclaimer saying that I may not get a child or my money refunded if I chose to proceed,” says Roxane. Even though she faced obstacles, Roxane did not waver for a moment. “I knew God had a plan for me and that this child, Mya, would be my family,” she says. “It was very difficult waiting with no guarantee, but my faith, hope, and support system kept me strong.”
The Snowstorm
When Roxane received word that she could travel to bring Mya home, she had less than ten hours notice. She hopped on one of the next available flights only to find that her travel plans had been curtailed. A snowstorm had caused a flight delay which resulted in her missing the last flight of the day to Guatemala. Stuck in a Texan airport, Roxane had a lot to think about. She knew that the Guatemalan Embassy didn’t see adoptive parents on Fridays, and with Martin Luther King Jr. Day the following Monday, it would be six days before they would hear her case. She was faced with the decision of whether to go home or to proceed with the adoption. “I had waited nine months, so a few more days seemed like torture,” says Roxane.
Bringing Mya Home
Although she faced some anxious moments, the situation soon became more positive when Roxane received word that AAI had made special arrangements with the Guatemalan Embassy because of her circumstances. Roxane finally arrived in Guatemala and brought Mya home in January of 2004.
Her First Mother’s Day
After many years of waiting, Roxane celebrated her first Mother’s Day with her daughter, Mya, a few months later in May of 2004. “Mya and I went to church, and I finally got to stand up and be recognized with all the other mothers,” says Roxane. “Then we went home and played outside. It was nice to feel honored and part of such a special club.”
Even in the midst of her joy, Roxane never ceased to remember the one special woman thousands of miles away who gave her the opportunity to become a parent. “I was so appreciative of Mya’s birth mother for making the difficult decision she made and grateful that it made it possible for me to be a mother,” says Roxane.
Adopting Again
A short time after bringing Mya home, Roxane looked to AAI’s Guatemala program again to expand her family. Just like the first time, this adoption journey was also laden with challenges, and Roxane once again remained positive throughout.
“Roxane was so fantastic through her process,” says Roxane’s international consultant, Chandra Doorn, who worked side by side with Roxane for both adoptions. “I admire the energy she put forth in educating herself about AAI, Guatemala, and adoption in general. It gave her this unique insight into the process and really prepared her for the journey. Her expectations were always realistic, and even during the more trying times, she remained objective and respectful of international adoption.”
Single Parent Adoptions
At the time Roxane decided to pursue the adoption of a second child, rumors were circulating that Guatemala was considering whether or not to continue to allow single women to adopt. This left Roxane with some uncertainty as to if she would be able to bring home another child at all. “It was difficult for me and for Mya as she also had hopes and dreams for a sibling,” says Roxane.
Bringing Isabella Home
In the end, Guatemala continued to uphold their tradition of allowing single parent adoptions, and Roxane again traveled to Guatemala in October of 2005, just as hurricane season was approaching, to bring home her second daughter, Isabella. Once she arrived in Guatemala, however, Roxane again faced weather-related problems.
Mud Slides and Hurricanes
A mud slide in the town where Isabella’s birth mother resided had washed out the road, which made it nearly impossible to retrieve her daughter’s birth certificate to finalize the adoption process.
“Somehow, my contact managed to get there and to get the birth certificate,” says Roxane. But shortly after her contact returned with the birth certificate, a hurricane passed over Guatemala. “We were so worried,” says Roxane, “but the mountains around the city protected us from the brunt of the storm.” Although the hurricane could have been devastating, the storm left the airport and the surrounding areas unscathed. “We were so fortunate,” says Roxane. “Again, God was watching over me and my family to get us together. What an adventure this has been! I still tell my girls what great stories they have.”
Mother’s Day Traditions
Retelling these stories has, in fact, become one of Roxane’s favorite Mother’s Day traditions. Every Mother’s Day, after going to church and having a special lunch together, Roxane and her daughters honor the girls’ birth mothers by looking at their pictures. Then Roxane retells the stories of the girls’ lives and how they became a family.
Blessings of Motherhood
Roxane treasures the time with her girls, whether this time be spent reminiscing about their past, playing outdoors, or dancing in the living room. “Both of my girls love music, and they have favorite songs that require all of us to drop what we are doing to dance,” says Roxane.
Although motherhood is the best job she has ever had, Roxane also admits that it is one of the hardest. Yet, the joys of motherhood are more than enough to counterbalance the trials. “They want me when they are sick or scared,” says Roxane. “They want to tell me about their day, and they look to me for love. It is wonderful.”
“A Good Mumma”
As her daughters grow older, Roxane wants them to know what an honor it is to become a mother and what this special job entails. “God trusts you to shape and guide a person to the best they can be,” says Roxane, which is something she remembers as she parents her two daughters. To Roxane, a great mother is someone who is also “loving, strong, and compassionate.” To Mya, a great mother is Roxane.
“Mya said to me yesterday, ‘you are a good mumma,’” says Roxane, “and nothing beats that!” Even Chandra says, “I hope to someday be the type of mother Roxane is to Bella and Mya.”
The Greatest Achievement
For Roxane, becoming a mother and having a family is by far the greatest achievement of her life, and she encourages other single women to become parents through international adoption as well. Roxane admits that “it is challenging at times doing it alone,” but she also says, “I have never had anything good that was not difficult to achieve.”
For More Information
If you are interested in adopting from Guatemala, please visit our Guatemala Adoption page.
